Now Think On That!

By: Ms. J Rivers

@ms_j_rivers

I absolutely love to read. I am a writer, so it makes sense that I keep a nightstand full of books. I often go to Google or a popular Christian blog to find the next new novel, and I pick and choose for my next good read. More often than not people choose books based off of a need. If I need something to entertain me I gravitate towards comedic books. If I need the Holy Spirit to speak to me I’d pick up a devotional or a book on the topic of my need. God has been dealing with my on my faith and breaking generational curses. Generational curses are spiritual bondages that are passed down from one generation to another, and can go back centuries. Those curses can warp our way of thinking and turn out thoughts, ideas and eventually behaviors into those that are not like God’s.

My biological family deals greatly with generational curses. We have a history of physical abuse, drug use, adultery, bad credit etc. When you are raised with a certain way of thinking you take that way of thinking into adulthood. If you don’t change your thinking patterns they will trickle down to your children. Now, I was adopted so I didn’t grow up with my biological family, however spirits and curses travel down through generations. On top of that, the family I was raised by didn’t exactly live by Christian standards.  I love my family, however there wasn’t a lot of loving reassurance. I wasn’t taught about managing my finances or how to establish and nurture outside relationships. I was only taught to go to school and get a good job. Life is about so much more than that. I was left feeling inadequate and lost as if I grew up on the earth alone. Negative ideas and feelings about myself and the world were embedded into my mind and spirit, and at times I wanted to end life. I was without God stuck in an endless loop of negative thinking. I have children, and it would break my heart to see them grow up with the same negative thinking that once consumed me. I met my biological family in 2008 and I immediately noticed all of those generational curses and where parts of my personality came from. The curses had to end IMMEDIATELY! 

I first picked up this book when I was living in a shelter. (READ 2 COR. 10:4-5) This book teaches you to train your way of thinking. You train it by reading the Word of God and meditating day and night on scripture. The more you tell yourself something the more you will believe it. When you establish a REALationship with Christ the Holy spirit will speak to you and feed you wisdom. It will reassure you that you are loved and deeply cherished by God. It will let you know that God wants what is best for you regardless of your past mistakes and of how others may feel about you. We have to learn to change our way of thinking so that we may cancel out all that the enemy has had us believing over the years. When you have a mind of Christ you will no longer believe those lies, and your words and behavior will line up with God’s word. My children are pretty good kids, however they do what they see and hear more so than what they are told. How is it right that I get angry with them for doing something they see me do? I could pray all day that my children grow up and live righteous lives, (which is a good thing to do) however if I don’t know which behaviors and spirits to pray against and cast out they may still inherit those curses that kept me and my ancestors in bondage.

 Our minds are what Joyce calls “Satan’s playground”. That’s where the lies form. Proverbs 23:7 says, “As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.” The mind is the leader of our actions. Romans 8:5 says, “For those who are according to the flesh and are controlled by its unholy desires set their minds on and pursue those things which gratify the flesh, but those who are according to the Spirit and are controlled by the desires of the Spirit set their minds on and see those things which gratify the Spirit.” A negative mind leads to a negative life. If no one throughout your ancestry has fixed their negative mind it only makes sense that it will be passed down to you, but it can end here. 

Part 2 of Joyce’s book is entitled “Conditions of the Mind”. What should the mind of a Christian be like? 1Cor 2:11 says, “For what person perceives and understands what passes through a man’s thoughts except the man’s own spirit within him? Just so no one discerns the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God.”  In other words, how are you supposed to have a mind of Christ if the Holy Spirit doesn’t dwell within you? 

“The mind should not be filled with reasoning, worry, anxiety, fear, and the like. It should be calm, quiet, and serene.” -Joyce Meyer

My mom is a worrier, and until I met her (2008) and formed a relationship with Christ I thought my worrying was normal and that it was just something women do. I grew up hearing that women naturally worry, so I never tried to change it. Worrying kept me without peace for so many years. It kept me stressed and void of freedom. I always wondered why I couldn’t be happy and why I was so judgmental, critical and suspicious in my relationships when worrying and a lack of faith in who God is was the culprit. I used to be a daydreamer growing up. I’d sit in class and my mind would constantly wander. I was a smart student, but some would say I had ADD because I couldn’t focus on any one thing for too long. A wandering worrying mind is not a mind of Christ, and the enemy constantly tries to get my mind to drift. I’d be reading my bible and my mind would slowly drift to something else without realizing it. The next thing I know at least 10 minutes have gone by and I’ve grown exhausted. I used to put the bible down and go to sleep, but now I pray against the enemy and keep reading. 

We have to stop letting our negative thoughts ruin our lives and relationships. People often wonder why things don’t change for them and why they don’t receive deliverance in certain areas. What sense does it make to keep praying for deliverance from lustful desires when you stay in front of a porn video? We have to guide our hearts and minds constantly. 

Joyce gives steps to follow in order to flow in the mind of Christ.

Step 1: Think positive thoughts

Step 2: Be God-minded

Step 3: Be “God-Loves-Me”-Minded

Step 4: Have an exhortative (encouraging) mind

Step 5: Develop a thankful mind

Step 6: Be Word-Minded

If you follow these steps, stay in your bible and on your knees before Christ you will change. It’s said that it is impossible to spend time with a person and not become more like them. The more time you spend with Christ the more your actions, words and thoughts will mimic His. Look at your life and future in a positive light and begin to “calleth those things which be not as though they were” Romans 4:17

PENNY PINCHERS....

The DEAL BREAKER ** Ques dramatic music**.... dun Dun DUN......pet peeves, ultimate annoyances, these are not too common in friendships but MOST common in romantic relationships. What are deal breakers? Things that people do, bad habits or things will make you stop dating someone, break up, ignore phone calls, duck and dodge and completely dismiss said individual. In this post I will be sharing a personal deal breaker of mine along with my experience with this particular deal breaker ....The humor begins!!   

  CHEAPNESS!!!!

 I WILL NOT date a guy if he is cheap! Ladies I know i'm not the only one who feels this is a deal breaker, but if I am, i'm perfectly ok with that. When I say cheap I mean just that.. frugal, skimpy, prudent etc. I in NO way mean a guy should not have his priorities in order or manage his money and lifestyle according to his income, if he didn't, that would be irresponsible. For example, I went on one "date" with a guy and we met (on first dates I usually met them where we are going) at buffalo wild wings, which is already an inexpensive restaurant...Definitely his choice. During dinner he went on to tell me more about himself, likes, dislikes, you know first date talk... now its time to order. I told the waitress what I wanted..now its his turn to order, he was a tall, big guy and looked like he would've had an appetite but had the smallest order in the restaurant... I could say more but I wont..lets fast forward to after we finished eating... now its time for the bill. So.. because we were at one the least expensive restaurants EVER the bill was no more than $25 to $30 at most, which is extremely cheap for a "date". This man pulled out the money to pay and had almost the exact change, "I just know his is going to leave a tip right?"  goes through my head because I DO NOT believe in not tipping a waitress under any circumstance...with that being said  the waitress comes back with 25 cents as his change...he left no tip and GET THIS... he even took the 25 cents of the table too! That completely turned me off!

Ok so you're probably thinking how could I really conclude that he was, in fact, a cheap person from this one experience...hear me out! 

After leaving the restaurant I thought maybe I shouldn't be judgemental... maybe he's really not cheap so I'll give him another chance. Of course he asked me on a second date. A mutual friend ours suggested he and I go on a double date with her and her friend. It was a Saturday evening and I was just getting off work... My friend and I played phone tag to see what plans we had all came up with in hopes of having a fun night. My friend said "how about dinner and bowling?" I was starving so that sounded about right to me.. So I tell him what we had come up with and he was very hesitant, so I said "think about it" and called my girlfriend back. Meanwhile dude is calling her while she's on the phone with me.... #weird.. My friend comes back in the line and says while laughing hysterically "Oh My Gosh this is ________ on the phone and he's saying he's irritated because he doesn't want to do both.. it's "too much money".... so you know what my response was "ok no problem" and I took my self to dinner and a movie! Never talked to or heard from him again! If I could ask him a question it would be "Do I look like the type you can penny pinch with?" Not to mention, you pull that on the 2nd date... I had already let you slide on the first one..... SMH! Most men try to fake it until at least the 5th date LOL...PENNY PINCHERS ARE REAL FOLKS! So with those two experiences it was enough for me to conclude he was indeed a cheap guy and also to generalize that conclusion to the lifestyle he leads.

Hope you enjoyed the story and had a little laugh because it was very true but looking at a bigger picture, as the young woman that I am, God has blessed me to be able to take care of myself and maintain the lifestyle that my parents provided for me, as well as have the desire to want more. So its simple if you cant give me what I can give myself, more or at the very least push me to want more..whats the point? 

What are your deal breakers?

   

SELF SERVED

By: Ayana Bryant-Weekes

I used to write in a diary. Everyday. What ever happened between waking up and falling asleep, I wrote it down before my head hit the pillow. Sometimes, my best friend and I would swap diaries at school and read what the other had written the day before and then talk to each other about what we’d just read. We laugh about our adolescent ritual now but I think we both liked doing that; it was easier to write down what we were feeling than to say with our own mouths, the secrets we were even afraid to keep.

Anyway, that was 7^th grade, ‘05 and we’d gotten into that habit for 2 years. At the end of 8^th grade, A LOT of things happened that subsequently ended my daily word dump. Breaking up with my first “real” boyfriend that my best friend didn’t like anyway, my separation from her at the hands of a dawning high school career AND simultaneously experiencing having my diary read by someone other than the only person who even knew I kept a diary.

I.Shut.Down.

My feelings were confused and my writing no longer felt safe. So I stopped and everything that would’ve held a page in my diary now stood in a long mental line of “I should write that down”. Welcome 2007 and Tumblr hits the scene. I quietly made an account requesting no follows and not following anyone and I would only post when my writer’s itch became unbearable. It was my new diary. Well the other day I was scrolling through my old posts and found “Self Address”, a letter I had written to myself in 2011 still relevant in 2014, as evident in “Sivlerspoonefed: The lesser evil” a post written at the beginning of this year.

Apparently, this new habit of keeping things in (though greatly improved) is still prevalent and in my attempts to be more transparent I have decided to share these posts with you guys releasing my desired change into the universe. 

James 5:16 says Make this your common practice: Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you can live together whole and healed … (MSG)

Now keep in mind that I am an artist…and I’m sensitive about my…

 

Self Address

Oct. 26, 2011

So…..if your any part human you have, at some point in your life, gone thru something that you felt no one in this planet was going thru at the moment. And the LAST thing you want to hear in the climax of your loneliness and in the midst of bawling your eyes out is tht “things could b worse.” That statement makes you seem shallow and implies tht you Dnt have the right to b upset abt watevr it is driving you to tears. That you Dnt have the right to naturally respond to a painful situation. So to avoid judgmental statements from “friends” or appearing weak by expressing your feelings you keep them in….and hope tht God can hear your heart & see your prayers in their purest form before your words get a chance to mess them up. you don’t even want to say wat you’re feeling out loud. & How can you be a true friend to ppl you Dnt evn trust to b true friends to you.? Knowing you would go above and beyond for ppl who only rock with you wen its convenient. Trust me its more factors tht affect self esteem than guys cheating on you. When ppl’s actions leave you wondering why they won’t be the same kind of friend to you tht you are to them you rarely ever get the answer. You try to figure this all out on your own, logically analyzing everything you’ve observed. but your only conclusion brings more questions for some one who seems farther away than the distance btwn Earth and the heaven we search for, and always seems to answer metaphorically wen you want straight up answers. All you really want is somebody to understand….maybe give advice…..but to mainly understand you and the place your emotion came from. And if you scroll thru your phone one more time looking for somebody to txt, you will have successfully memorized all your contacts in alphabetical order……backwards. Finding no one who will purely understand and not judge, you go back to feeling lonely yet brave for facing your loneliness alone. Maybe someone will notice how fake your smile is tomorrow or maybe they won’t. But it won’t matter because you have convinced yourself tht you are emotionally strong therefore you don’t need anyone to notice. And will never ask anyone to.

And tht is, by far, the stupidest thing you have ever done.

Sivlerspoonefed: The lesser evil

Jan. 17, 2014

"There’s always somebody worse off than You"

So be grateful they say 

But it seems like there’s always somebody worse off than You..

Somebody with too much on their plate to 

check and see if Your head is above water. 

so my silver spoon and I, we are well acquainted

My successful, church-going mother is still married to my sober, ever-present father whom I share with my only 16 year old baby brother. And the 4 of us, along with our cute little black Pomeranian, live together in a 5 bedroom mini mansion with 3 Christmas trees….THREE. and the Detroit River in our backyard. Parked in our two, 2-car garages is a jaguar, a 2013 Honda Accord and my sweet 16th birthday present. 3/4 of my household has 2+ college degrees. Bank.Abuse and alcoholism are strangers in my home. Dysfunction and poverty don’t frequent this abode. But I still can’t sleep at night.

Not boastful or braggadocios

I really believe I am

Blessed.

And by perception I need nothing.

How dare You.

Want for anything else

When they want everything You have…they perceive

You have everything You need so

they never think

to ask ”is there anything You need?”

So my silver spoon and I, we are well acquainted. 

He reflects my selfish

demons, my weak core, and my blessings that bare my curse.

Lonely 

because no one thinks you [should] need, and they always need

You. 

I’d rather eat with my hands. 

Life Hacks

By: Ayana Bryant-Weekes

One insanely boring night while away at school, I signed up for a website called StumbleUpon.com. Basically, you ‘stumble’ throught the internet landing on different websites based on your interests with a click of the ‘stumble’ button. Well, I got bored again and decided to do a little stumbling for old times sake. This time, I stumbled into 1000LifeHacks.com and found some pretty cool life tips. Obviously I couldn’t post all 1000 (the fact that I actually went through all 1000 is an embarassingly accurate measurement of how bored I was), but here are 18 life hacks I thought you guys would enjoy. Let me know if you’ve already tried some and if you plan to try any, I want to know how they turned out!

(This I have to see) 

(I'm definitely trying this!)

Photo Shoot: SNEAK PEEK!

Meet the ladies young & ambitious ladies of

 The "A" Team Talk Show 

(Pictured Left to right : Ayana, Ambrea, Ashleigh, Joanne)

Follow our business page on INSTAGRAM: @theateamtalkshow

&

Connect with us Individually

Ayana: @all_dat_hair

Ambrea: @ambrea_c

Ashleigh: @_justash

Joanne: @Joanne_halla

Look at her HAIR!!!

Every season of every year fashionistas around the globe jump to find the latest trends in fashion, cosmetics, accessories and more importantly hair style. In 2013 one of the biggest hair trends was the "Ombre" aka, grown out color, as I like to say. By definition the french term "Ombre" means gradient color applied locally on the end strands of the hair leaving a darker root. This was HUGE and still is if you ask me... Every woman on the cover of a magazine had the popular hair color, but as we know the word "trend" suggests that it is not considered a long term or lasting phenomenon but rather a short lived phase. 

We all love a sleek & sassy hair style that pulls our entire look together but some hair treands lasts longer than others. Pictured are some of the hottest, most glamorous, simple yet CLASSIC styles and not to mention some of my personal favorites. Read more below!

1.  Former supermodel Tyra Banks wears a classic middle part with soft sultry waves.

2. curls,Curls, and more CURLS... Singer/songwriter Leona Lewis shows off her "girl next door" natural curl pattern....if  you have these kind of curls FLAUNT THEM!!!

3. Actress Tika Sumpter wears another classic middle part with sleek straight hair. This look will never go out of style. 

4.The famous Bob.. a fresh, new look for Queen Latifah (who by the way.. never has a bad hair day!!!) In my opinion this style can either go very right or very wrong but her stylist nailed this look! 

5.The chic Kim K slick back ponytail. One of my go to styles. This look can easily justify even the most casual look all the up to a red carpet high fashion.

6. Bun life, another go to style. Similar to the last style the messy bun can be a run to convenient store look or an elegant look it really just depends on your fit...not every hair has to be in place, it's super simple and fun!

Hope you enjoyed! XOXO

-Ambrea

Patience During The Process

I was waiting for a while, waiting on that miracle, that instant moment when all that I’ve asked for would just appear right before me and cancel the process it takes to obtain the lifestyle that I desired. We’ve all been guilty of trying to rush the promise before the process, giving God a deadline, expecting Him to meet us at our demand oppose to allowing Him to set forth instructions and we meet His demand. Recall the last time you prayed for something, did you wait on God for a response or did you solve the problem before you even allowed Him to work on it for you? What we do is, we pray about something, ask Him for it and then begin to seek solutions without even ensuring the instructions were God made and not self-made. See, there is a process to your promise, in order to reap the desires of your heart you must first endure what it takes. One of the key elements to your promise while of course displaying hard work (Faith without works is dead, James 2:17) is having the ability to be patient during the process. 

Patience is an indescribable characteristic that is expected from everyone, but understood only by few. It is an action that requires a level of understanding that identifies your capabilities in reaching and maximizing the promise behind patience. Our promises are, in  most cases, rarely immediately supplied because God can see further than we can. He knows what promises we are ready for and the ones we would misuse if given prematurely, He knows the outcome of every situations even when we think we know best. Let me give you an example; I just recently gave birth to my 3rd son, and for the most part we all  understand the birthing process to some extent, whether you’ve given birth or not. During my first trimester I knew that at the end of my 9 months I would birth a baby, now yes we know during the pregnancy process a baby will be born, but we have no idea of the exact date. Doctors provide expected due dates, but that’s only so you can properly prepare for what’s to come. I went through my first, second and third trimester anticipating my baby boy, but when the due date that the doctors had given had come and gone I began to become anxious and impatient (Be anxious for nothing, Philippians 4:6). Becoming  annoyed that it was close to 41 weeks and my child showed no signs of labor and delivery, I tried every method to rush the process. July 2, 2014 I was scheduled to be induced, since God wasn’t moving at my (the doctors) demand we decided to expedite the process. They began to release a medication into my I.V.; this would help me go into labor. By the 2nd hour my contractions were strong and the baby was coming, or so I thought. Every time I had a contraction my baby’s heart rate would drop, it took 1 last contraction and the whole world stopped. Doctors and nurses took complete control, communicating, prepping, and preparing me for what I wasn’t mentally ready for, an emergency cesarean. I was confused, I was afraid; I had my last 2 boys naturally so this was a process I wasn’t prepared for. I went straight into prayer, I didn’t understand what went wrong and then God released this word into my spirit. If I had of gone into natural labor, I would have set at home until my contractions were only a few minutes apart and I would not have made it to the hospital in enough time and my baby boy may not have made it. I was so impatient during the process that I was willing and ready to go through extreme measures to birth my baby boy, but God knew best. He made me wait, He took me through experiences I wasn’t prepared for, He made me trust in Him! I waited 41weeks and 2 days for the arrival of my son because if things were done my way at 40 weeks, my baby would not be here. See, there is a promise waiting for you at the end of your process, but you must endure patience to reap a great harvest. 

Being patient is not easy it has an unidentified time limit that can become more and more difficult to meet when you are incapable of being patient. Our expectations can be so overwhelming that it completely eliminates our ability to be patient which causes us to miss the promises from God. You’ve been praying and asking God for certain desires, seek instructions and be patient. We may never understand the length of the process; just know that He’s preparing you for the promise Deuteronomy 28 (desires).

“9 And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.” 

Galatians 6:9 KJV

Don’t give up; God hasn’t forgotten about you, He’s preparing you. Each day continue to  strive toward your promises and be patient during the process. In all you do seek ye first 

the kingdom of God and always Chase Great!

“3 For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow 4 So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.” James 1:3-4 NLT

Be Blessed xoxo,

LaToya Early