I love the holidays, particularly at the end of the year. This time of year is so exciting! Most of us are preparing for the holiday and getting ready for a new year and this is when I look forward to new beginnings and do my own year end review to look over my past mistakes and lessons learned. Here are a couple things I've learned about life, parenthood, balance and so forth this year.
- Each and every child is different and you have to treat them accordingly. My children are thirteen months apart, and although they're close in age, they are completely different. My daughter is self sufficient, my son is not. His whining used to bother me so much, and still does, but I had to realize that I can't compare my children, nor can I discipline them the same, or talk to them the same way. Through trial and error I've learned the importance of treating my children like individuals instead of a group.
- Every relationship needs clear communication, and expectations to be clear. This was huge for me. Being a mother is important, and my marriage is the most important (yes it says this in the bible also.) A lot of arguments could of be avoided had we had clear communication. Same for friendships, we and in this case I, sometimes can place expectations on my friends and when they don't follow through, I'm upset. All of this must be communicated with every relationship you have. This was something huge I learned this year.
- Redirection is huge! So, I'll admit, I am big on discipline, but not everything needs a spanking. I learned the importance of redirection for my children, but I've also learned the difference between needing to use redirection and discipline. When my children are crying because they can't get their way it's no need to have a debate, young toddlers don't understand why they can't have something, which means you have to explain the reason to them and redirect your children to a "yes" !
- Patience! I have none, and the minute I asked God for patience, the more I was tested. I reworked my schedule sometimes to have more patience. As I mentioned before, waking up earlier in the mornings allows for more patience with your children. Same goes for life, preparation is huge in life and decreases a big rush. Preparation is key!
- Pray till you can't pray anymore. I saved this for last but it is the most important. Although I consider myself to be a spiritual person, prayer was something that I didn't do everyday. Life can get so busy, but prayer is important! Of Course we take our big issues to God but what about the small things. Praying for a good day, praying for your children safety while at school, praying you make good sound decisions. Recently, I've started my days off with prayer and it helps!
**This weekend was my daughter first dance recital, she did so good and loved every bit of it!!
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Jessica M. Byrd is the parent of a two and one year old.
She is the founder of CHICMoms (formerly Detroit Moms Rock) and believes
every mother should live a life on purpose!
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