How My Children Taught Me Discipline and Structure

By: Jessica Byrd

Please let me begin with a disclaimer: my blog in no shape or form is suggesting that you need to have children for structure, this is just my experience.

Let me introduce you to my life before children. I did what I wanted to do when I wanted to do it and that was all to it. This spilled into my career as well, I knew I only had one person to take of which was me. So I never took work seriously, I came and gone as I please, my whole mindset was, "I'm not working in my desired career so whatever!" The max I would stay at a job was 1 year and it was an accomplishment if I made it that long.
I didn't work out, and I pretty much ate whatever I wanted, and going out was of the norm. Boy has my life changed!

Now let me be honest, at first I wasn't willing to accept my life wasn't the same. I wanted to do the same things and sometimes at night when my children were asleep and my husband was at work, resentment would come staring at me face to face.

After a while I started to embrace this new life and it really affected me in a positive way!  It took me literally two years to get structure within myself and it really does make for a more peaceful day. My mornings used to be my daughter waking me up, me rolling over super tired, leaving out for work and taking my daughter to school super late and talks with my boss about my hours.

Well.. My daughter started a new school and she has to be there on time for Circle Time,  this consequently helped me with structure. The reason I couldn't get up in the mornings was because I stayed up late enjoying my only "me time". Someone told me about working out in the mornings instead of after work when you can easily forget about it. I searched a boot camp Groupon and started working out at 5:45-6:30 am in the mornings, come home, make my daughter breakfast, and we"re out the door by 8:15. I found my "me time" in the mornings working out and plus I'm getting fit! Win win situation!


In addition, I had to learn proper eating habits for my children, so we rarely and I mean rarely eat fast food. I am now becoming best friends with the crock pot, and meal preparation during the week.

Weekends, both of my children have activities in the mornings so I have to develop a routine for Saturday mornings to get my daughter to dance at 9:45 and my son to soccer, starting in October.

I am really learning the importance of structure and structure takes discipline. This has really helped me personally because I am going from a always tired and exhausted mommy to learning about balance and preparation to be a happier mommy and wife. I'm still learning but as of now I am very pleased with myself, pats myself on the back (moms learn how to do that, there's no awards for this job!)

In other news: my daughter first week at her new school was amazing, she cried the first day and didn't cry since! My son will start the same school once he turns two.

 

Oh! Also, the devil has really been trying to get my family from going to church. It feels like every Sunday there is a roadblock! Not today I had the family up and out for church on time! Take that devil!

I can't wait for the Moms Club Meet and greet this Saturday!


 



Jessica M. Byrd is the parent of a two and one year old. 

She is the founder of Metro Detroit Mom's Club and believes 
every mother should live a life on purpose!

Happy Labor Day Everyone!

By: Jessica Byrd

We"re preparing to send my daughter to a new school tomorrow and I'm excited and nervous at the same time.

In other news, I want to talk about the emotional detachment we teach our sons just because they are Boys. My son will be two in December and I can't help but to notice how different  friends and family treat my son than my daughter. Sure I understand saying, "put down that purse" or "that's for girls" but this one time my really close friend was over and she has a nine year old son. My son was crying for some reason and she said to him in a deep voice, "stop that crying" and he started crying more. I immediately responded he doesn't react well when you speak to him that way, I still speak to him soft no matter if he's a boy or not, I mentioned,  I leave it up to his father to speak to him in a manly firm voice, but I am still his mother. Her response, "well he will always cry with his mother then." I revisited that statement when I got home and thought about a couple of things and started to do some research. I found my research to be quite interesting, it talked about the pressures and emotional detachment we try to embed in our sons as early as one year old. There is this stigma that our sons have to be tough, and crying doesn't involve being tough even for a toddler. And while many times I did fall into this stigma after the research I separated myself from this society pressure we have on boys. Sure I want my son to grow up and be a man but I also want him to have feelings. If you've been following my post for some time you would know that I don't condone cry babies for both of my children. I express using your words for my son and daughter but I also understand the need for toddlers to cry sometimes and I don't look at it differently because of their gender. I think we shouldn't try to teach our boys so young to try to be a man forgetting the fact that they are human. I do understand why we do this, but for now lets let children be children!


We spent Labor Day weekend at the Michigan State Fair! I couldn't believe how expensive it was now that it's moved to Troy. None the less the children had a great time!

 




Jessica M. Byrd is the parent of a two and one year old. 

She is the founder of Metro Detroit Mom's Club and believes 
every mother should live a life on purpose!