A Mommy Minute With Jessica Byrd: Mom's and The Workforce

By: Jessica Byrd
 
Last Monday, due to my daughter, Lailah, being home sick, I stayed home with her. This meant taking a sick day to be Doctor Mommy . Which brings me to this week's Mommy Minute post; do employers really respect, better yet understand your duties as a mother? I've always been raised to believe that my children come first, no ifs, ands, or buts about it! From as long as I could remember, if I was sick, my mom was right there by my side. I know some mothers in the workforce don't have that same luxury, but I'm also wondering, when you call in sick because your child isn't feeling well, does your employer really respect this or do they see this as another excuse?!  Women have come a very long way, we're now able to provide for ourselves, get higher paying jobs, be bosses, and educate ourselves, but, when it comes to the workforce there still seems to be a thin line between the understanding of your number one job, Motherhood! 

I'll never forget an employee once told me, "never tell your boss your excuse is your children, they don't want to hear that." I immediately thought "Children are NOT my excuse, they"re my reality." It's so hard for working mothers, and that's not to say being a stay at home mom is easy; something as simple as leaving out the door can be a power struggle with toddlers, truth be told.  By time we get to our own work, sometimes we're already tired, exhausted and mentally stressed from a meltdown our toddler decided to have on their way to school. While I understand the importance of leaving your problems at home, and putting on your big girl panties and keep it moving, I don't think It's fair for employers to ignore the importance of motherhood and simply look at caring for our children as an excuse! For mothers struggling with this I suggest two things:

1. In your next employer, examine the culture of the job. This is very very important! I know as mothers we do what we have to do to provide for our children, but I wholeheartedly believe we deserve to be happy even at work! If your job is stressing you out, not being understanding and causing you more headache, it might be time for you to seek another employer. I think we have this mindset that all employers won't care about you being a mother first but that's not true! Examine the culture of your new job, some employers really believe in work, life, balance. This may mean allowing you to work from home one day a week, having a flexible schedule and etc.

1. If seeking another employer isn't an option find the peaceful time for yourself before you get your day started. As mentioned in one of my previous blogs,  many times, I would be exhausted the night before, and my children would wake me early in the morning. By that time, I'm a walking zombie and we're rushing out of the house. Someone suggested setting my alarm clock an hour early and start my day with prayer, that way I controlled the mornings instead of my demanding toddlers. Furthermore, we're not rushing out the door which usually causes more confusion. 

Believe me mothers I know the struggle of being a full time mom, and trying to jumpstart your career is not easy--the tolls it takes on you can be very stressful. It's important that everything we do, aligns with the fact that first, we're mothers! Even if that means forgoing  a dinner party during the week because that night you have to prepare for your morning. It is a daily struggle that will continue  until your children turn 18 (kidding!) 


This weekend we watched Michigan State's victory over U of M!!!! And Sunday the whole family went to church! 

Don't forget our moms and finance workshop is approaching! Must RSVP to attend!

 
Jessica M. Byrd is the parent of a two and one year old. 

She is the founder of Detroit Moms Rock and believes 

every mother should live a life on purpose!